Autumn Glory is in my Garden

 Begonia's are blooming in my hot house.

 This is a lovely native hibiscus that is thriving in my potato box out the back.  The only downfall of this plant is that the flowers only last a couple of days, so I have to check each day so as not to miss them.

 This is the Make A Wish Salvia, and has been flowing like this ALL summer and now into Autumn.  Great value in the garden.

 Hannah Gordon Rose - a lot like Double Delight.

 Japanese Windflowers . . . and this lovely Clematis

 . . . and finishing off with this spectacular Begonia at my back door.  That was a walk around the garden with me today.

Xephyranthes

 I think it was last year some time when the lovely Ros from Bloom sent me an exciting parcel in the mail.

 It contained some very special bulbs, and this is one of the results.  I'd forgotten what it was, and the tag has long since gone west, so I set about investigating my mother's gardening books the other night.

 This was the result: Xephyranthes. commonly known as Rain Lilly.

 It is so beautiful and just a single flower so far. 

 -Thank you Bloom-

for sharing some of your garden with me.

Autumn has come and it's a wonderful time in the garden.  Lots of pinks at the moment and . . . loving it.

I forgot to mention

 Thank you all for your responses to my last post.  I forgot to mention how important my blogging and the blogging community were in those difficult years.  It was so helpful to be able to loose myself in a creative, supportive community and share passions and ideas, and also receive such wonderful feedback constantly from all over the world. Thank you all.

 I'm feeling much better heading into the next week, and I wanted to mention how wonderful it was to see this well worn quilt hanging on the line in my sister's garden on my last visit Up North.  I make my quilts with love and to see them loved is my reward.

 Zinnia's would have to be one of my favourite Summer flowers.  They are so bright and cheery, and last for such a long time. 

 I have a soft spot for hydrangea's too.  I set up a watering system this Summer so they haven't suffered at all.  Soon it will be time to prune them all back.  I think I will take lots of cuttings this year.  There are always more places to plant them . . . don't you think?

Half Way

 Last year I turned 50.  I always thought that used to be half way.  But really and truly, people don't generally live to be 100 as a rule.

 Reaching this significant marker in my life, it got me thinking fairly seriously.  I have made some big decisions in the last couple of years. Looking back now some time has passed, I can see that they needed to be made, but the timing had to be right.  I'd been trapped in my own lunch box - hiding from the reality of desperate situations and finding it hard to breathe.  In order to keep the momentum of life going, I often behaved in a manic way, and sewed continuously, in my room, blocking the light of the world . . . of my world.

 I made beautiful quilts, a beautiful garden, and lived for the beauty of new wonders each day in the garden.  It is a sanctuary for me out there - just wandering and wondering, and sometimes not even thinking at all but just keeping so busy that I didn't have to face the harshness of my reality.

Almost 2 years ago, I separated and divorced my husband of 21 years.  Someone once said to me:

"what you want at 26 is not necessarily what you want at 46"

I have broken the family that I helped create and in so doing have broken my children's hearts.

It was a very hard decision to make - but I believe it was the right one.

I felt my life was over - I was going through the motions -

Figuring that I am actually past half way, I decided that I needed to be happy.  I decided I deserved love in my life. I decided that I could use a break from living constantly on the edge, watching my words and following rules.

I made a choice.

I still love my children.

I am still their mum.

I will always be their mum.

I am a stronger person now, but every now and then I feel helpless and have some bad days.  This week those days have found me.

I've spent most of the day . . . in my garden

 

My Ballarat

 Yesterday I went for a lovely walk in the local Botanical Gardens.

 I am always delighted at just how beautiful they are.  A lot of work goes into maintaining them, and I really should walk through there more often.

 My main motive was to look inside their glass house, and see what they had growing in there.  I thought it would give me some ideas for mine.

 It is a magnificent structure in the gardens and it was just lovely inside.  I sat on the comfy chairs for awhile just 'drinking' it all in.

 I have water Lillie plants in my garden fish pond, but I have never been lucky enough to get a flower.  These were just beautiful.

 The sun was shining, and the band was playing music in the park across the road.  It made for a very pleasant afternoon in the gardens.

I think I'll go back again another day.

Oh . . . happy days

 Pardon me, where has the day gone.  Oh I know, I have been sitting out in my hot house chatting with friends and admiring my garden.

 Here is the wonderful creation made mostly from recycled materials. The door is the old front door from my school.

 It was very hard to photograph as it nestles into the garden quite well and is cosy amongst the plants.

 The old window came from Clunes, which is a small town just outside Ballarat.  When I bought it for $10.00 the seller asked me what I was intending to do with it.  When I said I was going to make a hot house, he offered me 2 more windows and a sliding door.

 The planning and the dreaming was all part of the process.

 If you can't find me ever, you know where I might be - yes on my special seat, looking out onto the garden.

 Another bonus was that it has all been paved.  A friend gave me some left over pavers which was just perfect for the bottom of the house.  It has made a wonderful finish inside.

 Can you see the palm my mum bought me.  She said all hot houses needed a palm.

 Here you can see it better, and a red geranium in a pot outside the front door.

 This beautiful rose is called "Dearest"

 . . . and this is the view from my back door.

I LOVE IT!